Losing Someone

 

Hi Lovies. I hope you're having a great weekend. The weather is being rude, and my air conditioning can barely keep up... I cannot wait for the leaves to start changing and the fall be upon us. 

I am soooo not a summer person!!!

Mentally, I am struggling a bit; but probably not in the sense people are thinking. I have faced a lot in my 50 trips around the sun; some of it good, some of it amazing and some it not so great. 

Currently, I am sitting between a couple of those positions, and it really sucks that for the first time in decades, this path is a solo one.

I have mentioned that there have been quite a few deaths in my life recently; oddly enough, I have been handling them pretty good... 

It's the "death" of those still living, that I am having difficulty accepting and moving on from.

I had closed myself off to many people who have passed through my life, and have gotten pretty good at it. When they say, "you can't just cut people off"... as a Sagittarius, it's one of our specialties. Normally, I cut ties and just walk.

This person has meant so much to me that I have tried and tried to keep what we had alive; to the point now that it feels like there is absolutely NO effort from their side at all anymore... The one thing you should know about me...

I AM NOT A BEGGAR!!!

Actions, or lack there of, have consequences... even for this person. I can no longer sit by with worry and love what isn't there. Taking the scissors and severing the tie that binds (this one) is utterly painful; but it needs to be done. I wish them nothing but the best... well, at least as close to the best as they can get; since the best they had is me... and I no longer am a option for anything.

~ Phoenix